Honesty is important in any relationship but within psychotherapy, honesty takes on a different dimension. The impact of speaking the truth has many repercussions to the therapeutic relationship and may harm the perception of the therapist in the eyes of the client or the relationship in its entirety. Thus, what are the limits of what a therapist can therapeutically share with a client? What are the implications of the therapist choosing to conceal what they congruently experience? Have therapists in the past been more able and more willing to tell the truth with their clients?
Rob Hill engages with these and many more questions, which lead into related territories – those of shame, power, love and hate, narcissism, intersubjectivity and madness – and invites the reader to consider them from a fresh perspective. Presented in essay form interspersed with ‘stories’ which focus on Hill’s inner reactions to working with various clients, the book seeks to evoke curiosity and contemplation rather than definitive answers.
Using language that is personalised and ‘immediate’ rather than academic and abstract, Hill hopes to engage all therapists, including those who rarely read academic and research literature. Telling the Truth is an enjoyable, thought-provoking, and accessible read that raises many important ideas. Rob Hill’s own honesty, insight, and openness in addressing this important topic makes this essential reading for practising therapists.
Rob Hill is a relational psychotherapist with a private practice in London, UK, in which he works with individuals, couples and families. He also offers supervision to other psychotherapists. His psychotherapy and supervision training was at Metanoia Institute, London.
Dr Marie-Anne Chidiac, Co-Founder and Director of Relational Change (relationalchange.org), author of ‘Relational Organisational Gestalt: An Emergent Approach to Organisational Development’ –
‘In the post-truth age, where truth is seen as optional, Rob Hill conveys with exquisite vignettes and illustrations from his work, the intricacies and struggles of truthtelling. He doesn’t swerve to avoid discomfort or difficulty, and provides an inspiring read to all those who make “use of self” an integral part of their practice. His well-researched reflections look at shame, narcissism, and power, and how these shape our perception of truth – both in interpersonal work and larger systems. This is an important book for our times, as we sit with the struggles, risks, and vital importance of truthtelling in the therapy room and beyond.’
William F. Cornell, author of ‘Self-examination in Psychoanalysis and Psychotherapy’, editor of the book series ‘Innovations in Transactional Analysis’ –
‘With Telling the Truth, Rob Hill offers us a beautifully written and rather unsettling book. Hill’s writing alternates between theoretical discussions regarding the complexities of truthtelling, truth hearing, and truth avoidance. Interspersed with his personal voice through an imagined conversation with a former patient for whom he looks back on his work with considerable regret, self-examination, and personal “un-concealing”. This is a courageous book in which Hill examines the power and risks of truthtelling – “un-concealing” – not only to our patients but also to ourselves.’
Professor Charlotte Sills, Ashridge Hult Business School, Metanoia Institute, UK –
‘This is one of the most stimulating, challenging, and intriguing books I have read in a long time. Rob Hill engages with that age-old question of how, why, and when the therapist might disclose to the client what they are actually thinking and feeling. Rich with theory, reflection, and clinical examples, the book is a real adventure.’