£21.59 – £31.99
A compelling true story of one woman’s battle with the aftermath of childhood trauma, which gives a gripping account of the often controversial and misunderstood condition of dissociative identity disorder (DID), formerly known as multiple personality disorder. This emotional but ultimately uplifting journey details the unforeseen twists and turns of the effects of therapy and how it can help in coming to terms with the past and its unsettling echoes in the present. Heartwarming and lucid, it’s an inspiring tale for all to read.
Through its clinical rigour, professional therapists will also gain insight into the various treatment options for DID, including the innovative use of energy therapy. The book contains 32 colour illustrations, including 24 drawings by The Girls.
Read Gill Frost’s thought-provoking blog on Healing the wounds of the past and her blog series for PESI.
Scroll down to watch her engaging video about the book or visit her website for more insights into The Girls Within and dissociative identity disorder.
| Author | Gill Frost |
|---|---|
| ISBN | 9781912691593 |
| Format | Paperback, e-Book, Print & e-Book |
| Page Extent | 344 |
| Publication Date | November 2020 |
| Subject Areas | Psychoanalytic Theory, Psychotherapy, Trauma & Abuse |
Praise for The Girls Within
‘The tough subject is handled with extraordinary compassion, and written in a compellingly clear, warm style that will engage laypeople and psychotherapy professionals alike. …
The twelve-year connection between patient and therapist recounted here is a complex, looping, juddering rollercoaster ride; a journey readers will feel deeply invested in, and much compassion for.’
Joanne Owen, LoveReading.co.uk
The star of this book is an extraordinary, bright-spirited, and entertaining six-year-old girl, called Little Vivvi, who experienced shocking abuse from members of her family. Yet Little Vivvi lives within Vivian, a middle-aged woman who has struggled with DID for many years. The challenging process of psychotherapy is laid bare, as Little Vivvi wrestles with overwhelming memories of childhood abuse. Alongside talking therapy, energy treatment, which she calls Wooshing, is utilised to astonishing effect, becoming the enigmatic ingredient that finally enables Little Vivvi to find relief from the distress and fear that had dominated her existence.
As therapy seems to draw to a close, Izzy appears. A very sensitive, thoughtful and mature eight-year-old, Izzy too needs love, support and treatment to speak about her trauma. After overcoming her understandable distrust, Izzy enables an exceptional ending to the therapeutic journey, far beyond anything Vivian and her therapist, Gill, could have dreamed.
Little Vivvi and Izzy will make you want to laugh out loud as well as cry. Their story teaches so much about suffering, dissociation and survival. Their aim is to enlighten, inspire and offer hope to others through reading their incredible tales, which reveal the astonishing power of The Girls within.
Gill Frost started her career as a teacher and went on to be a counsellor and psychotherapist for 35 years. Her first therapeutic training and work experience was with RELATE, where she worked mainly as a couples counsellor for 10 years. It was at this point that Gill decided to study for a masters degree in psychodynamic counselling, at the University of Birmingham, in order to work at greater depth with individuals.
Gill’s degree opened up opportunities for her to work as a student counsellor and trainer at Warwick and Coventry Universities for several years. It also enabled her to return to the University of Birmingham as a clinical tutor and lecturer, on the same course where she had been a student.
It was over 20 years ago that Gill set up in private practice. During this time she worked with a growing number of clients who presented with childhood trauma and abuse. As a result, she became increasingly interested in dissociative disorders, including dissociative identity disorder (DID).
Gill benefitted greatly from workshops and seminars provided by individuals such as Valerie Sinason, Suzette Boon, and Carolyn Spring, who are experts in the field of DID. Additionally, Gill undertook training in an energy psychotherapy called advanced integrative therapy (AIT), becoming an accredited AIT therapist. Later, she also completed Level 1 of the internal family systems (IFS) training. Collectively, these experiences gave her the understanding and necessary skills to work more effectively with clients who were traumatised by early abuse. It also enabled Gill to write her book, The Girls Within.
Introduction: Distant memories – devastated lives
Part I: The comings and goings of Little Vivvi
1. First meeting
2. New room
3. Trauma treatment
4. Telephone talks
5. Greek tragedy
6. The aftermath
7. The problem with being a girl
8. Dark nights
9. Christmas 2013
10. Cabin fever
11. Preparing ground
12. Breaking news
13. The fallout
14. The three faces of Vivian
15. Just Angry
16. New boundaries
17. Increasing integration
18. The book
19. An exorcism
20. The fear of being alone
21. Role reversal
22. Mothers and daughters
23. Team work
24. Talk! Talk!
Part II: And then there was Izzy
25. Black shadows of the night
26. Striking a deal
27. Out of hiding
28. Belief after betrayal
29. Poor Baby
30. A slipped disc
31. Internal family systems
32. The joy of being inside out
33. Night terrors
34. A burning rage
35. Down to the wire
36. Beyond the chequered flag
Postscript
Epilogue by Vivian
The last word from Little Vivvi
Family trees
Acknowledgements
About the author
References
Glossary
Resources
About The Girls Within from Gill Frost on Vimeo.
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Joanne Owen, LoveReading.co.uk –
‘Written by counsellor, psychotherapist and clinical tutor Gill Frost, The Girls Within relates the moving case study of Vivian, a woman struggling with the impact of extreme childhood trauma. The tough subject is handled with extraordinary compassion, and written in a compellingly clear, warm style that will engage laypeople and psychotherapy professionals alike. While Vivian’s childhood experiences and resulting adulthood disorders are affectingly harrowing, the restorative twelve-year relationship between patient and therapist brings waves of joy.
‘After a horrific childhood, Vivian went on to a nursing career with no signs of trauma until she and her husband began couple therapy. It was then Vivian first spoke of the emotional, physical and sexual abuse she suffered as a child, and began to experience flashbacks, seizures and dissociative identity disorder (DID). As the author explains, “Dissociating is something we all do at times when we are feeling uncomfortable or in pain, either physically or emotionally… in order to relieve the discomfort we would otherwise experience”, but in extreme cases like Vivian’s, “dissociation can evolve into dissociative identity disorder (DID).”
‘This tells the story of two girls living within Vivian: six-year-old Little Vivvi (whose drawings are featured in the book) and teenage Izzy, and of the innovative therapies that spoke to Vivian during therapy, most notably Advanced Integrative Therapy, a form of “energy psychology” that holistically links body and mind, and draws on traditional knowledge like chakras. The twelve-year connection between patient and therapist recounted here is a complex, looping, juddering rollercoaster ride; a journey readers will feel deeply invested in, and much compassion for.’
Alistair Ross, Associate Professor – Psychotherapy, Oxford University –
‘It takes a unique kind of courage to go to deep places with a client who becomes a constellation of clients. Gill Frost has that courage, allied to the bravery of Vivian, Little Vivvi, Izzy, and others. The result is a compelling account of therapy that touches the soul.’
Melanie Goodwin, co-founder and chair of First Person Plural –
‘This book is a gift to people living and working with dissociative identity disorder. Thank you to Vivian and all her internal family for allowing Gill to share their incredible journey. The genuineness and power of this story captures the innate drive to survive a childhood that is beyond horrendous.
‘Gill’s honesty with her own challenging journey, which runs parallel to that of Vivian and her internal family, allows the reader to share her roller coaster of emotions: elation, confusion, total despair, sadness, frustration, and, at times, peace and joy.
‘Clinicians reading this book will welcome how Gill continually emphasises the importance of the therapeutic relationship with all the parts and how, when this is firmly established and in partnership with Vivian, she introduces advanced integrative therapy (AIT), “Wooshing” to little Vivvi and “Calming Therapy” to Izzy. This offers a unique insight into how other therapies can support the core therapy when the conditions are right. Gill’s respectful curiosity and loving approach at all times is validating for each part, enabling trust to be experienced for the first time in their lives. Her firm and consistent boundaries, which are at the heart of the healing process, provide the bedrock on which this amazing journey unfolds. Making the links to difficulties in adult Vivian’s life helps us all to understand the impact of unresolved childhood abuse that continues to have an impact on every hour of every day.
‘This book has captured the way different personalities have developed, how important each role was in survival, and how logical they are within the context of Vivian’s childhood. The beauty of this story is tangible on every page and I want to thank Vivian, Little Vivvi, Izzy, and the other parts for allowing us to hear and share their story. I also want to thank the whole team because this book will offer hope and insight to survivors, therapists, and many others. Through the humane storytelling, we can all, whatever depths we plunge to, know things can change and to always hold onto this.
‘“Tough emotions are our contact with life,” says Susan David, psychologist – be mindful of this when reading this book.’
Phil Mollon, PhD, psychoanalyst and energy psychotherapist. author of ‘Multiple Selves, Multiple Voices’ –
‘Gill Frost, with her client Vivian and internal family, have written a remarkable book – a full and detailed account of a successful but lengthy psychotherapy of dissociative identity disorder (DID), resulting in a harmonious association of previously dissociated personality parts. This engaging narrative describes the inevitable challenges to the therapist’s assumptions, theoretical framework, and technique presented by DID – and the need to adapt and respond to the particular traumas, roles and functions, and age-specific cognitions of different dissociative alters. A crucial component was the use of an energy psychology modality, known as AIT but internally called ‘Whooshing’. The resulting text is a very significant contribution to the literature in the three areas of trauma, DID, and energy psychotherapy.’
Dr Valerie Sinason 2016 Lifetime Achievement Award ISSTD –
‘This is an inspirational book which tells gripping, interweaving real-life stories. First, it is about the respectful relationship between a thoughtful therapist and a courageous patient (and parts of a patient) with dissociative identity disorder. Second, with the subject hardly included in UK trainings, it helpfully shows Gill Frost’s responsible and reflective ways of making sense of what is happening, the hopes and hurdles. Third, we witness the hard work and integrity of all “the girls within” as they dare to tell their stories and offer their pieces of the jigsaw. At times harrowing, although never gratuitously, and ultimately hopeful, the unfolding account of “the girls within” will help professionals and survivors alike.’
Tina Taylor, Warwickshire –
This is a truly amazing book. It’s a fascinating, gripping and emotional read and at the end I felt privileged to have been able to share and understand Vivian, and the Girls’ journey through Gill Frost’s brilliant writing. You don’t have to be a trained therapist to enjoy this book. Just read and be incredibly moved by the triumphant outcome.
Mary Ing, Midlands (verified owner) –
This is an achingly tragic story which ends happily. The clarity and vividness of the writing enables the reader, whether professionally trained or not, to make the incredibly difficult journey alongside Vivian and her alters. It depicts the huge range of emotions, trauma and turmoil experienced by both the client and the therapist over many years. It is through the love and dedication of everyone involved, which brings about the satisfactory and hopeful ending. A brilliant read.
Carol Dougill – retired head teacher –
‘Although I have had a long career in education, as a teacher, and head teacher, and have been a special needs co-ordinator, nothing quite prepared me for finding out about Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). When a close friend of mine was diagnosed, I was pleased that she could confide in me and when she told me about The Girls Within I was pleased to find a book that would answer many of my questions, written in a way that a non-specialist could access.
‘The Girls Within is a book for everyone with an interest in DID. It is a compassionate, fascinating and heart-warming book that takes its reader on a journey of enlightenment, capturing the courageous pathway that Vivian, Little Vivvi and Izzy travelled, sharing through Gill their ‘healing’. Thank you for allowing me an insight into your world and also for giving hope to many.’
Dr Jane Bailey –
This is a fascinating book! I am impressed by the massive amount of time and effort that both Gill and Vivian devoted to achieving the calming and integration of Vivian’s internal family and it is an absorbing and compelling read. As a doctor (now retired) I had never heard of Dissociative Identity Disorder and if I had met Vivian as a patient I would probably have diagnosed Schizophrenia. Although the book is primarily for mental health care professionals it should be of interest more widely and will hopefully increase the diagnosis of this condition.
Andi Smith –
I have just finished reading Gill Frost’s amazing book The Girls Within. Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) is something I knew very little about other than having read the book Sybil many years ago when the condition was then known as multiple personality. The book is beautifully written and can be read and understood by those not involved in the Psychotherapy world, of which I am not. The illustrations are wonderfully drawn by Little Vivvi and ultimately produced which helped to understand the devastating trauma she had gone through as a little 6 year old. It is a very detailed day by day case study of how the treatment was carried out by Gill over many years. I imagine it will become somewhat of a Bible for other clinical psychotherapists who are faced with patients such as Vivian.The bond and strong relationship between Vivian and all her alters with their therapist is evident from the beginning and the reader also realises the dedication and huge amount of time and commitment required from both therapist and patient to commence this treatment. It was also evident the effect that Vivian’s illness had on her immediate family and despite feeling it would be against all the odds that they could survive as a team, they did so quite remarkably. Again testimony to the expertise offered to them by Gill. A really interesting read and one not just for the academics.
Kate McMahon –
The Girls Within is such a fascinating, compelling and highly readable story, even with no prior knowledge of DID or the world of counselling. I enjoyed every chapter and fell in love with ‘the girls’. I laughed and cried in equal measure. The book is a beautiful testament to the girls’ and Gill’s openness to respond to the unfolding journey they took together.
Amazon customer –
A 5-star Amazon review: “Amazing and inspiring” I can’t rate this book highly enough. An amazing book for counsellors and psychotherapists working with clients with DID. This gives an insight into the world of someone With DID and shows the importance the the therapeutic relationship. Also good for people with DID it can be a scary journey but this book can make it a little less so. There are good people out there. This book captures a truly amazing journey for both therapist and client. Thank you for the generosity and courage in sharing this journey.
Amazon customer –
A 5-star Amazon review: “This book should be a ‘must read’ for any health professional” Gill Frost and Vivian, her adult client, have both had the courage to embark on a 12 year journey of healing in this incredibly informative and engaging book. It tells the story of Vivian, a client with Dissociative Identity Disorder, and the younger parts of herself who, with Gill’s help, are finally able to find the love and trust they need. This book is extremely easy to read, both for therapists and non-therapists, and is written in diary form with added observations and comments. This book brings awareness of this little recognised condition to a public arena and should be on the bookshelf of every therapist and mental health professional. It brings true hope to those who have suffered childhood trauma and abuse. Highly recommended.
Janet Ainsworth –
This is a compelling account of an extraordinary therapeutic relationship. Gill and her client, Vivian, undertake a remarkable and at time, perilous seeming, journey together. Both are unfailingly resolute and courageous as they work to release Vivian from a lifetime lived in the thrall of what is now known as DID.
Gill writes with energy and clarity – the book is a page turner in the very best sense of the word.
PJ Hutchins –
A 5-star Amazon review: “A very readable book about DID” This book is written in a very readable format and describes a long journey uncovering trauma and otherwise unknown parts of Vivian. This book is a must read for anyone interested in DID( Dissociative Identity Disorder), therapists, doctors, health professionals and other interested people. The dedication of Vivian, her therapist Gill and the whole of her family is so clear throughout the book. This piece of therapeutic work is a very long process with a amazing outcome. I can thoroughly recommend it as a good read.
Caroline Still, ‘psychology enthusiast’ –
I bought this book after hearing Gill Frost on the Jeremy Vine show (Radio 2). I read it cover to cover non-stop in 5 hours, totally transfixed. This was an absolutely fascinating read, written so beautifully, compassionately, and in a very easy to understand way for those not familiar with DID, like myself.
What an absolutely beautiful soul Gill is, teacher and therapist for the fantastically brave Vivian. As the book documents the sessions in chronological order, you take on the journey of Gill and her team, Vivian’s external and internal team, all working together. How brave, strong and patient you all were to get to an emotionally stable union, and joyous outcome. Written with such sensitivity and with approval from little Vivvi to let it be just so. It seems so right to focus on the healing journey Gill led Vivian through, rather than the story of the trauma.
The resources at the back of the book will send you scurrying for more information from the appropriate sources. This is truly a recommendation for anyone either familiar with, or not with, DID. A bible of sorts that sets out hope and understanding of DID, appropriate therapies and skills for helping people deal with their trauma.
Thank you so much for sharing, and writing this exceptional and inspirational book.
Ann Carr –
We are the parents of a young adult currently experiencing DID. Gill Frost’s book has been very helpful as an introduction to this incredibly complex subject. Sadly the resources and information available refer mainly to childhood sexual abuse and neglect as the causes for the development of this amazing coping mechanism. It should be emphasised that while in most people wth DID the traumatic memories relate to the above, it can also develop in young children who are incredibly sensitive, empathetic, form strong emotional bonds and are vulnerable to the loss of friendships and the usual changes relating to growing up. We would implore anyone learning about DID, treating clients or supporting friends and family to consider the many life events that could result in dissociative disorders.
However we found the book fascinating and would like to thank Gill Frost and Vivian for sharing their incredible story, one ultimately of hope and healing. This has given us much comfort and enabled us to engage in a community of supportive individuals who can help us care for our daughter.
Amazon customer –
5/5 stars: This book should be a ‘must read’ for any health professional
Gill Frost and Vivian, her adult client, have both had the courage to embark on a 12 year journey of healing in this incredibly informative and engaging book. It tells the story of Vivian, a client with Dissociative Identity Disorder, and the younger parts of herself who, with Gill’s help, are finally able to find the love and trust they need. This book is extremely easy to read, both for therapists and non-therapists, and is written in diary form with added observations and comments. This book brings awareness of this little recognised condition to a public arena and should be on the bookshelf of every therapist and mental health professional. It brings true hope to those who have suffered childhood trauma and abuse. Highly recommended.